Monthly Archives: October 2017

Tantra Secerts to enlightenement

Breathe.  That is right Breathe.  Everything becomes clearer.  It is the path to enlightenment.  It floats on the breath.  Your breath is your connection to the divine and universal energy.  It is what lets in the energy and by breathing out connects  you with the divine.

There are three main breaths and today I will present an overview of the first sutra.

Osho recommends to try each breath experience and find the one you are most in tune with and use it. Most people are naturally drawn to one form of the breath so it is not a right or wrong, good or bad choice, it is which one feels most natural to you. Also you aren’t trying to change the way you breathe as much as you are trying to be aware of the breath. Buddha achieved Buddhahood by practicing one simple mediation and that was to simply be aware of the breath; the coming and going of Parma. Each Sutra has the same purpose. Breath is the life force or Parma. When we are born we take a deep breath in and our body comes alive. Throughout our lives we breathe. It is something we can do and be totally unaware or we can be aware of our breath. In Tantra the cycle of breath is representation of life. The outgoing breath is a death and the incoming breath is a rebirth. To quote Osho “The gap between the two is of a very short duration, but keen, sincere observation and attention will make you feel the gap. If you can feel the gap, Shiva says, The Beneficence. Then nothing else is needed. You are blessed, you have known; the thing has happened.”
This is a completely simple technique that it seems almost something a fool would point out. It is non-intellectual. However, it represents a complete truth of our life cycle. We are born, we die, and the space before we are born is an unknown as is the space after our death. We can believe what we like, but there is never any certainty in that belief because we can’t know. We can only believe.
The first Sutra is as follows:

Radiant one, this experience may dawn between two breaths. After the breath comes in(down) and just before turning up(out)—the beneficence

This is the sutra I use for my own personal work. I am not saying it is the best. It is just the one I respond to most closely and innately understand. It is also a technique I was familiar with through Hatha yoga. However, I didn’t understand the philosophy behind it or that it had any meaning at all. I often teach this at the beginning of the massage and explain the philosophy behind it.
Another point to understand is the pause in the breath no matter how slight is a time when the body is neither working or thinking. The breath stops, the heart stops and the mind stops. Each of those brief pauses add up in our practice of a Sutra or meditation and over time that is where the benefit of the Sutra resides in the rest and calm received from being aware of the pause. That is the complete lesson. It is to be aware and to extend that awareness to feeling the breath come in through the nose into the lungs turn and come back out and up through the nose.

*A practical note: All of these conscious breathing techniques use the nose and lungs. Breath in through the nose—pause—breath out—pause. I explain it that way. The nose is connected to our lungs so we use it to breathe. The mouth is connected to our stomach so we use it to eat with. You can tell a lot about a person based on their breath. The higher up it is in the body the more tension and trauma they’re storing. I always encourage people to breathe deep into the body, into the center of the body. The more we breathe into the center of our body the more centered we are in our life.


This is a link to the Osho book.

Another book I recommend is The Compound Effect Darren Hardy




The Secret behind Tantra-Bliss Breath

Tantra people make their living by selling their secrets or talking about sexuality in a way the cuts through shame or by offering services that many view as sexual.

The truth is Tantra does hold some secrets that can greatly enhance a person’s bliss and quality of life. I have to be honest most of our lives aren’t spent in bed making sweet love. It makes sense Tantra enhances other aspects of your life. It has mine. I have enjoyed excellent health since my practice of tantra, unusually good health for someone my age.

I believe this can all be traced to one thing—breathing correctly. Yes, that is the terrible secret of Tantra, the breath. Or as one client said, “this is a game changer.” I laughed and said I know, it is.

It goes by different names. Bliss Breath is one. I am a bit more basic. I try to stay jargon free. I am not trying to be anyone’s guru, I am not trying to gain followers. I simply want to share the life enhancing practice of tantra.

I call our main breath simply deep conscious breathing. I follow more Buddhist principles on the importance of breath in keeping us present and in our bodies and out of our heads. The most important principle of Tantra is to be totally present with your pleasure. Only when you can be totally present in your body and pleasure can you exchange energy with your partner.

To stay present in Tibetan Tantra we use deep conscious breathing. This type of breathing overrides your brain and brings you into a state of relaxation and calm. We can change our Consciousness by controlling and using our breath and that is one technique Tantra uses to enhance intimacy.

This diagram shows the basic breath we all should be using throughout the day. When I teach this breathing technique I give breath cues. It is surprising how many people struggle with this breath, especially those that work at desk jobs. And while this breath brings health and well-being to the body, short shallow breaths, single to the body you are under stress and your body dumps cortisol,the stress hormone, into your system.

On the tantra side. This type of breathing slows down the experience, awakens nerves, and the skin and therefore increase sensitivity, and intimacy.

Soulmates & how to find yours

If you are in a relationship you might be with your soulmate right now. How can that be? We fight, we have differences, I am not as attracted to them as I used to be. This is the fact about human relationships until you transform them. If we are with a person even for a night, something about that person drew us to them. We connected even in a small way.

Certain people trigger our desires, you wants, and needs.

Sometimes we even marry these people. And sometimes the marriage is happy and we do live happily ever after.

However, what I see in my practice is that we often marry people that trigger our own insecurities and who we aren’t sexually compatible with. And then we think the only solution is a divorce. If there is abuse the only solution is divorce, but otherwise why not learn to transform them into your soulmate.

A soul mate is just a person with whom you connect on a soul level. We all can do this by being open, honest and willing. A soul mate isn’t a person whom we fall in love with at first sight and our deeply infatuated with. Infatuation and love are often incompatible.

What I have found with Tantra, once you change your relationship with yourself to one of self love and peace of mind it is easy to extend compassion and love to our partner. It is however, impossible to have a truly happy marriage without

Sex is an important way to communicate at a soul level.

1-There is the merging of two separate bodies, that symbolizes unity, universal unity.

2-There is the pleasure of orgasm that makes us have good feelings toward our partner. Orgasms when used correctly increases love.

3-Learning Tantric communication skills eliminates conflict. Conflict is reframed as a problem to solve.

If you argue about money, as a couple you sit down develop a budget and stick to it. Conflict is just undefined problems. Problems have solutions. Conflict causes hurt and pain.

4-You look at everything through the lenses of compassion and kindness.

Tantra offers techniques to change a relationship from simply a marriage to a soul connection.

Making a Relationship Work, or should a Relationship feel like Work?

Do relationships take a lot of work? Is marriage hard work? No, Marriage and relationships should not take a lot of hard work. Jobs take hard work, careers take hard work. Why would you want to be in a relationship that takes hard work. I am not going to be friends with someone that makes our friendship seem like work. Why would I? It doesn’t make sense. If it feels like work to be with that friend I am not going to be their friend. I have have a lot of things in my life that require work. I want a friend to have fun with, go out to lunch, drink wine, go to concerts stuff like that. I definitely do not want to be around someone that picks at me, comments on my actions, doesn’t appreciate the things I do for them and isn’t

reciprocal in our interactions.

I recently ended a one-sided friendship like that. It turns out this person was a grudge holder also. I looked back over our friendship and saw that it was me that did most of the buying dinner, driving, gift giving, and giving compliments. It wasn’t worth it to me to resolve differences or solve problems. People change, but they don’t change very much or as in my case you didn’t really know the person or choose to overlook serious character flaws. I said character flaws. That is a real thing. Some people lie. Some people cheat. Some people steal. Those are not mental disorders. They are character flaws. Especially, if they make a habit of them. And those are things people can only change if the want to.

What makes a relationship work?

Empathy, You honestly care how the other person feels and extend compassion and love. An example is when a parent dies or there is a misunderstanding . A lover doesn’t try to fix those feelings or say they are wrong, they give them time and space to grieve or resolve the problem in the relationship.

Intention. There is an intention for the relationship to be a priority in both of the people’s lives. There is an intention to behave in a loving manner. Love isn’t a feeling it is an action.

Consciousness. The actions within the relationships are ones of conscious choice about everything, children, homes, jobs, and there is a continuous dialogue about dreams, emotions, life and in that dialogue both people are equal.

Intimacy. This includes emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy. I often get emails from men saying they miss the intimacy in their marriage. What they really mean is they aren’t having sex. Sex and intimacy are not the same thing. Sex is an act of the body. It can connect us intimately, but it doesn’t always do that. If you don’t have an intention for sex to connect you it won’t. Too many people use sex as a way to relieve stress or to manipulate. Sex is for pleasure and intimacy. Emotional intimacy also needs to be encouraged. Your lover is the one that needs to hear your dreams, your hopes, your fears, not just the problems but also the wonders

Love. You have to love the other person and act with love in relationship to them. I am not talking need, or desire, or want. I am talking love.

Empathy, Intention, Consciousness, Intimacy, and Love makes a relationship happy, but it should never feel like hard work.

Tantra Course for the Tantra Seeker

Good Morning Tantra seeker,

I hope the day finds you well and in good health. Health is our most important gift. It is the only thing that truly counts.

I have currently marked down my course to $479,99.

This is a comprehensive course that covers all aspects of Tantra. Tantra isn’t just a sexual practice. It is a practice of self care to bring greater health to the body, a stronger connection to our emotional center or our heart to your sexual energy. Instead of feeling disconnected during sex, there is a feeling of connection and greater intimacy.

Tantra turns partners into soulmates. It aligns your Chakras with your partners Chakras. This reduces conflict, creates harmony, and produces intimate, connected sex.

Emotionally,Tantra quiets the mind, allowing you to feel and be present. It helps with ADD, depression and anxiety.

Sexually, it produces full body orgasms, multiple orgasms for men and women.

Tantra is the one philosophy that embraces joy, and our body and soul as one.

Jill mfa,PhD,ms certified in tantra and Kundalini

Tantra Course and Benefits From Full Body Bliss to Peace of Mind

My full tantra course is on sale until Monday 11/1.  It covers the fullness of  Tantra

1-history and philosophy

2-breathwork& Meditations


Learn how to build and use bliss  energy to be happier, experience longer lovemaking, and full body expressions of bliss.

It is nice to get a massage and talk about issues. However, to really get the benefits of Tantra you have to understand Tantra.

The benefits it offers are as follows

1-healthy sexual function and a healthy relationship to the body and sex.

2-The ability to quiet the mind and be present

3-increased energy and health.

4-multiple and full body orgasms

5-better flexibility and freedom in the hips

My Full Course is on sale until October 16. For 489.99 and then will return to original price of 689.99

True Love and how to find it

When I grew up we called it True Love, then Soulmates, now a Twin Flames. What does any of that mean? I don’t know. I know I  meet people I  love that I  can’t live with and that I  have lived even married  people I don’t love. I think Facebook has made it more important to put a public face to love and more pressure to label it as special. I know the difference between love and infatuation, and that seems to escape many people.

I have many clients who see me to discuss the idea they are missing some vital thing in their lives. They believe it is good sex, more sex, or more variety, I ask why they have waited until 62 or 74 to seek this out?  The sixties and seventies are not prime year for sexual exploration.   They just aren’t.  It is difficult to find like minded people.  Generally these men are married and have a fantasy to find a interested married woman that won’t want anything from them emotionally so they can explore this “sex” they have been missing.   I can’t even tell you what  a bad idea this is on all counts.

The reasoning is they have been married 30, 40, years and have not found sexual enjoyment in their own marriage and time is running out.  They love their wives but now want to explore other sexual feelings.  That is hard for me to even write.  You have been married to a woman for 34 years and have been sexually unsatisfied.  Why? At no point did you decide to talk about this, did you not bring up your feelings, did you not bring up your needs.  These men have told their wives of 32 , 34 years or more, they are going to seek other sexual encounters.  Obviously, the women feel manipulated and don’t want to give up the comfort and life they have invested years into and so give tentative permission.  They then come to me and seek validation.  I can’t give it for the simple reason they have a willing sexual partner at home that hey love, at some point you have neglected to nourish the sensuous, loving part of your relationship as a couple and now you think you can find intimacy in a sketchy side relationship with no emotional ties?  Also this behavior to me is a manipulative and damaging.

What True Love includes:

A key factor in a good loving partnership is honest compassionate communication. Another key factor is hot sex.  It is hard to get hot sex unless you communicate.  Followed by respect, equal division of labor–both people are contributing to the marriage equally. Lack of resentment, mutual attraction, and tolerance of differences.  Also the ability to be your authentic self, which means if I want to spend my Saturday watching cheesy Lifetime for Movies for Women it is okay for me to do that occasionally.  Couples that have True Love do not argue, they solve problems, they do not comment on the other person like a narrator in a documentary, instead they respect space and boundaries. And neither person tries to control the other. And they want to fuck each other, a lot.

Within those guidelines you can find true love.  It might not be infatuation or lust or that I can’t live without that person feeling.  Those feelings are generally illusory.   They don’t last. They don’t produce true intimacy.  And on the subject of intimacy, intimacy isn’t sex.

And having non emotional sex for exploration is a lie.  It doesn’t happen. And if one of the things you are missing is intimacy, non-emotional sex isn’t going to produce that.  Marriage, partnerships are a good place to have hot sex.   To be with  trusted partner to explore your sexuality is a good place to be.   If you have failed to  develop a satisfying sexual relationship based on intimacy, then it is never too late to do that.  You don’t have to look outside for what you have at home.  I can say that as a counselor, a Tantra Professional and as a woman.

Women like sex, we like it a lot.  I know this as I have women friends and they like sex. I have had a few friends that don’t like sex, but they have other problems beyond sex and I have had to stop being friends with them.  Yes, I know there are damaged women out there, but I also know that a loving relationship can go a long way in healing them.

It starts with honesty and communication.  True Love is honest and that is important in bed.  To be honest about desires, fantasies, needs.  Most women want o please their partner and most men at they same.  If you have not been able to do this, with the person you love, it is unlikely you will be able to do it outside your marriage.

True Love, Soulmate, Twin Flames at all different words for a relationship that works and includes red hot sex. sex3









Full Body Orgasm & Divine Bliss

I get a lot of questions about this particular topic. A lot. I wasn’t aware they were so hard to come by. I had them on occasion when I was married, but they left. Then when I divorced and got experimental and tried tantra massage for the first time that sort of woke up my yoni. And I have had full body orgasms since. I didn’t really understand how I was having them, but when I got full tantra I understood the process and how to give them to others. Then I went a step further and began to connect to what I can only say is divine bliss.

Tibetan Tantra has front generated mediations. They are used to bring divine energy into your body.

I have been working with the fire element mediation that is connected to our sexual organs. This energy that can be tapped into gives me orgasms that I can’t even explain. This is from my yoni training, or self pleasuring. However, I can’t even explain the intensity of these orgasms because I barely touch myself and it is like the universe explodes in my body.

During partner sex, I often now see my energetic body and that is like connecting on an entirely different level. It is a fireworks display. It’s like pleasure at an Olympic level.

I read other tantra people and they are talking about how to have an orgasm or use a yoni egg. I am like what the fuck. Are they missing something. That stuff is so basic. Tantra has so much more to offer than information you can find in an old copy of Joy of Sex.

Tantra connects you with divine universal energy that moves through your body sending every atom in motion. You can settle for your basic orgasm, but why would you want to when you can feel like stars are being born in your body?

How to Create your Soulmate

Tantra turns a partnership into a soulmate relationship by:

1-Breathing together in heart/hand connection and yab yum

2-learning how to communicate with compassion and empathy

3-learning how to touch each other

4-aligning the Chakras to feel fully connected

5-Experiencing full body orgasm together

Authentic Tibetan Tantra Course on Sale

Tibetan Tantra teaches you the following techniques to bring increased presence to

all aspects of your life

1-Breath work to increase health, regulate mood, and achieve full body orgasms

Some people refer to this breath work as Bliss Breath

2- Lingam and Yoni breath to bring energy and control to the sacred portals of bliss

3-How to achieve full body orgasms

4-Complete instructions on the Secret and Sacred Tibetan meditations

These Meditations connect you with divine universal energy to heal your body

or to just increase well-being

5-The Green Tara mediation to connect with the ascended master on a personal level

so she can bestow merit.

6-how to give and receive a tantra massage including the lingam and yoni massage

Last as a bonus 7 days of couples exercises to create a Tantric soulmate relationship